People have been
asking me “what are your plans?” and it occurred to me that from the past few
months, I’ve really not given a thought to it because things have been happening
*themselves*. It feels that I don’t have
a say or an authority to dictate anything to anyone or anybody. And as I sit, I
feel that it is not something new, it had happened before and it’s happening
now. So what has really changed?
There have been days when you’re stressed, or you’re tired, or you didn’t sleep well the night before, or you got into a fight with your best friend, or with your parents, or you ate too much, or you forgot to wish your relatives a happy birthday, or your roommate used your stuff without asking, or the PG food is horrible, or the food at your nearest place is not worth eating, or you spilled hot coffee down your shirt, or the traffic saps the life outta you, or the wi-fi tests your patience, or it suddenly rained when you were least prepared, or you lost your debit card, or you saw your bank account statement, or your boss yelled at you, or plans fell through. There have been days like these and there will be days when everything happened. There will be days when nothing happened. There will be days when it’s because it’s a Monday. There will be days when it’s because it’s not.
There have been days when you’re stressed, or you’re tired, or you didn’t sleep well the night before, or you got into a fight with your best friend, or with your parents, or you ate too much, or you forgot to wish your relatives a happy birthday, or your roommate used your stuff without asking, or the PG food is horrible, or the food at your nearest place is not worth eating, or you spilled hot coffee down your shirt, or the traffic saps the life outta you, or the wi-fi tests your patience, or it suddenly rained when you were least prepared, or you lost your debit card, or you saw your bank account statement, or your boss yelled at you, or plans fell through. There have been days like these and there will be days when everything happened. There will be days when nothing happened. There will be days when it’s because it’s a Monday. There will be days when it’s because it’s not.
There will be days
when everything and nothing is the straw that breaks your back, and you want to
cave in. Sometimes you begin to. Sometimes you do even though you don’t want
to, not really. There will be days when giving in, when relenting, seems so
easy and so obvious, and it will be painful when you do it. There will be days
when you feel useless, and more hopeless, and lost. There will always be these
days.
BUT there will always be a tomorrow, too. And there will always be right now. And you’ll have to learn to forgive yourself, even when you slip. After all, you are only human, and humans sometimes falter. And really, that’s okay. And deep down, somewhere, in the part of you that decided the good days and your happiness and your health were all worth fighting for, you know that, too. Hold onto that knowledge. It’ll see you through the worst. There are as many days to win as there are tomorrows. Days that you can win. Days you’ll win. Because these days — the bad ones — don’t define you. Not unless you let them!!
So things might not have really changed after all?!
BUT there will always be a tomorrow, too. And there will always be right now. And you’ll have to learn to forgive yourself, even when you slip. After all, you are only human, and humans sometimes falter. And really, that’s okay. And deep down, somewhere, in the part of you that decided the good days and your happiness and your health were all worth fighting for, you know that, too. Hold onto that knowledge. It’ll see you through the worst. There are as many days to win as there are tomorrows. Days that you can win. Days you’ll win. Because these days — the bad ones — don’t define you. Not unless you let them!!
So things might not have really changed after all?!
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